Totally random dispatches from a goofy lesbian Presbyterian who loves books, history, old-time radio and walking.
The Village Carpenter Mrs. Fruit's woodworking blog, filled with pretty pictures and words I've never heard of. I really don't know what she's talking about. There are also a few cute pics of our companion animals, because we're gay and it's a requirement.
Mrs. Fruit (aka the Village Carpenter), Lady- and Dr. Burg and I had a wonderful dinner last night with Wyldth1ng, who's back in the states and on his way to the mid-west. It was great meeting him; he's cute as a bug's ear. Here's a photographic record of the good times:
Every time I start crowing about our perfect little life, shit happens. Although this week could have gone much worse. It started on Monday with a 5:30 am trip to the hospital for Mrs. Fruit's dad's open-heart surgery. That was a good experience, although I was tired as hell, and unshowered.
We went home to shower and walk all the dogs, and Mrs. Fruit made an appointment to take our cat, Idgie, in for an emergency look-see at the vet's. I say "our cat," but really, Idgie was the Mrs.' little baby. Not only did she pre-date our relationship, but also more importantly, she was fiercely attached to her mommy. She would cuddle with Mrs. Fruit every night before I came to bed. By the time I would settle myself in, trying not to disturb all the fuzzy babies on the bed, Idgie was so relaxed and so happy. Moving her was like moving a giant bag of sand. She was a big-boned girl.
The vet had bad news, and I came home early to go with Mrs. Fruit and be with Idgie while we put her to sleep. Severe, irreversible renal failure. Idgie lay in her mommy's arms, while Mrs. Fruit sobbed and sobbed and cried all over her fur. I've been with 4 cats who have had to be euthanized, and this was by far the most peaceful death I've witnessed.
Despite this shitty beginning to this hectic, crazy-ass week, the surgery went swimmingly and Mrs. Fruit's Dad was already imparting his vast medical expertise to his nurses by Tuesday afternoon.
I visited him yesterday morning and anticipated that he would tell the nurses I was his daughter so that there wouldn't be an issue with me technically not being family. You know, because of the fact that I can't legally marry his daughter. He was still a little loopy from the anesthesia, and did tell the nurse that. Then, without his hearing aids, he thought she was questioning me, and he kept saying, "She's family. She's family." To the next nurse, he referred to me as his "relative."
When I went in to work--the same day--I received my long-awaited revised employee handbook. I discovered: I can't get bereavement leave if something happens to Mrs. Fruit, not to mention health insurance. And they've removed "sexual orientation" from the list of protected statuses. It is, however, against our so-called Human Dignity Policy to tell homophobic jokes in the workplace. Big deal.
Lest the kvetching takes over, it has been a wonderful time to experience the love and prayers and well wishes of so many people. I've felt the love, and I've needed it and relied on it.
Well, I'm feeling better about things. I hate to be such a sad sack---that was something I was really good at when I was younger. But, today is a good day. The weather is cold, but sunny. And the birds are singing. I have an afternoon and evening free of all obligations. Well, almost all. I have to hit the grocery store to buy food for tomorrow's coffee hour at church and get gassed up so I can help deliver valentines to our home- or nursing home- bound members tomorrow. But other than that, I'm free as a bird. I haven't even showered yet.
About the surgery: Mrs. Fruit's dad feels good about it. He toured the facility yesterday and got the 411 on the surgery and the recovery. He's spoken for the first time about what he'll be doing after the surgery. I don't think he was that optimistic before.
About the cancer: it is cancer. In Mrs. Fruit's mom. But, as I said, it's a small lump and will be operated on a week after her husband's surgery. She's optimistic, if only to protect her adoring, screaming Mimi daughter. Mrs. Fruit LOVES her parents. And so do I.
About my brother: who knows? I don't want to call him because he believes his phones are tapped. Essentially, he has an ex-con friend who has done some pretty horrible things---allegedly---involving hidden cameras and date-rape drugs. My brother has calmed down some. But he still needs to move. And get away from all the shit he's been doing and all the shitty people in his life. Drugs really suck. That is, the kinds that ruin one's brain. That goes for booze too.
Despite all this, life is good. Mrs. Fruit's mom will stay with us next week, while her hubby's in the hospital. I'm taking half days to walk the dogs and help my Mrs. cope. She's terribly, terribly busy at work. Which is good. But, she's got a lot going on. But it's good. Everything's good.
Got more details about my brother's predicament this weekend.
He's in deep, deep shit. So deep and frightening and disgusting that I can't even really explain what's going on except to say that he and his family are moving as soon as he can get the house ready. And my mother is trying to figure out how to get the FBI involved without jeopardizing my brother's life.
My brother has been drinking and drugging since he was 12. As a result, this once-bright man has no judgment and makes friends with the wrong kind of people. His "friends," who are involved in some heavy-duty shit, have threatened to kill him.
This all sounds so crazy. Mrs. Fruit and I have such a conventional, safe, sober, crisis-free life together. We were in our pajamas on Saturday night at 7 pm, for crying out loud.
Hearing the things these people have done to my brother and his wife, with my young niece and nephew in the house, make me sick. Mrs. Fruit was afraid she'd have nightmares last night. It's that bad.
Every time the phone rings....well, you get the picture.
Wyldth1ng is back on American soil after his deployment to Iraq. Check out his blog here and experience his travels across the eastern U.S. and his deployment in the trenches of Navy medicine, also known as our health care system for veterans.
Mrs. Fruit and I have been having a strange month. We both feel like we're teetering on the edge of something major and calamitous. That our perfect, crisis-free life will soon be in upheaval. Here's what we've got on our minds:
1) Mrs. Fruit's father is having open-heart surgery in 2 weeks. I do feel better about this, after reading that a 90-year old Mike Wallace had a quadruple bypass and was up walking the next day. But still.
2) Someone very close to the both of us might have cancer. We find out for sure on Friday, and if it is, the prognosis is very good: it's a small lump caught early. But still. Cancer. Jesus.
3) My mother called me last night and told me that my brother, who has partied like it's 1999 for about 25 years, called her yesterday morning, agitated and not making sense, raving about people who were out to kill him and who spiked his drinks. He told mom, "If something happens to me, don't believe anything the authorities tell you." He lives in a rural part of WV that is also home to several white supremacist groups. He recently visited Mom with his wife and kids and stayed out until 2 am drinking. He smokes cigarettes and other things and doesn't exercise. In the past year, two of my mother's friends have lost children who are near my brother's age. That she might also lose her child is on her mind. She called my father after the crazy call from my brother and said about their son, "We'll end up burying him."
4) Our home consists of 2 dogs, 1 cat, lots of lumber and books, and 2 women in their early 40's. Hormones are happening in my house. And not the fun teen aged kind. Enough said.
Craft Mentality Amber and Tasha talk about kntting, sewing, cooking, reading and Project Runway.
Craftlit Billed as a "podcast for crafters who like to read." Heather is a writer, teacher, mom, blogger etc. with great insights. Podcast ends with a chapter or two from whatever book is currently featured.
Russell Brand Alas, old Russ resigned from the BBC so his podcasts are no longer available, but here's a link to his youtube website. He's smart, articulate and damn sexy. And he knows that "drugs is bad."
Savage Love Podcast Profane, disgusting, entertaining and very educational podcast based on Dan Savage's sex column. I've learned about some things I rather wish I hadn't, but can't stop listening. Mrs. Fruit refuses to partake----too many F-bombs.
Stephen Fry's Podgrams Writer, actor, comedian, filmmaker, Mac enthusiast and really interesting podcaster. The worst thing about this podcast is that he doesn't do it enough.
The Archers My current, hopeless addiction. A daily podcast of the world's longest running daily soap.