God bless the Women's Circles of the PC(USA). This is an actual conversation that Mrs. Fruit (aka The Village Carpenter) had with her mother (Fruit Loop). Well, not actual actual. I changed some names and the phone number of course. Fruit Loop called my beloved yesterday on the way to carpool with two of the ladies in her Circle.
Fruit Loop: Mrs. Fruit, I can't go to Circle. I've got diarrhea. You've got to meet Silly and Edith and tell them I can't make it. I don't have their cell phone number.
Mrs. Fruit: Okay.
Mrs. Fruit drives to where Silly and Edith are parked. She tells them her mom has diarrhea and won't be joining them. Neither of the ladies knows where she's going; they were depending on Fruit Loop. Mrs. Fruit tells both Silly and Edith, very clearly, "You drive in the general direction. I'll go home, get your hostess' number and call you immediately with the cellphone number."
Mrs. Fruit goes home (it takes about 2 minutes), gets the number and dials Silly almost immediately. The phone rings FOUR times.
Edith (Silly's passenger): Hello?
MF: It's Mrs. Fruit, from church. I'm calling you back with your hostess' number.
MF: It's Mrs. Fruit, from church. I'm calling you back.
MF: It's Mrs. Fruit!
Edith: Hang on, please.
MF: Silly, I've got the number.
Silly: Edith, dig in my purse and find a pen and something to write on.
Time passes by, ever so slowly for Mrs. Fruit...
Silly: Okay, go ahead.
MF: Okay, the number is 555-1234.
MF: No, 555-1234.
MF: No, it's 555-1234.
Silly (giggling): okay, Edith, it's 555-4321.
MF: No. It's 555-1234.
MF(out loud): You got it!
MF(to herself): crazy bitches!